Why I have a job...

About an hour into nursing school, we were informed that the market was flooded with nurses and new grads would have a difficult time finding a job. This was pounded into our heads from day one. By the start of second semester, I decided maybe it was time I started looking for a job...so I could have a foot in the door. I briefly looked, but nothing came of it. I became concerned. I started praying. And I decided to start fasting. I fasted every Sunday for over a year. After a lot of thought and prayer, I decided that a job was not right for me, but maybe volunteering was. So, I applied at four different hospitals. One hospital was extremely rude and I decided I'd rather die than work there. There were no openings at another hospital and one other wouldn't return my call. I finally had some luck with Community Regional Medical Center. I started volunteering basically taking discharged patients from their hospital room to their vehicles and running labs and stuff back and forth. It was pretty dull. I didnt' feel like I was making any progress towards getting an in. And then, there was a new opportunity opening for "cuddlers" in the NICU. I signed up! I interviewed and got a position (volunteer) and started doing that job. It was hard. Nurses were not very cool about letting us hold their babies. But there were a few who were receptive. Whenever I got a nurse who would let me hold her baby, I made conversation and let them know I was a nursing student. After several months, I got tired of not being able to hold babies very often. Then, a nurse stopped me in the hallway, asked if I was Michelle Edwardson, and if a particular supervisor had found me yet. I was sure she was mistaken. I left the supervisor a note and gave her my contact information. I heard nothing from her, so I made an appointment with the Director. My intention was to get her to talk to the nurses and let us hold the babies! However, when I walked in her office, I heard myself say..."I want a job. How do I go about getting one?" She offered to create an extern position for me, which she did. Unfortunately, it didn't work out since my school didn't have a contract with that hospital. I was very discouraged...very discouraged. But, I kept volunteering. Meanwhile, a very coveted position came up at Kaweah Delta Hospital as a student nurse intern. I knew it was an opportunity to get in the door. I did NOT want to work at Kaweah Delta, mainly because they start at 6:00 AM and I live an hour away. Not cool! Getting up at 3:45 in the morning for school clinicals twice a week AND working as an intern would have been VERY difficult. However, I had an in! The position was in a unit where a former instructor of mine worked and she offered to give me a recommendation! So, I applied and got an interview. I prepared A LOT for the interview. I knew all the answers to all the questions they could ask. And when I went for the interview, I CHOKED! Really choked! Like I've never choked before! What the...? In the end, I was sad that I didn't get the job because my interview SUCKED! However, I was RELIEVED not to have to drive down there an extra day or two every week because I knew my family would have taken the brunt of that deal...and it wouldn't have been pretty. Fast forward to graduation. I graduated! And I took the boards three days later. I made an appointment with the Director of the NICU the day after I took my boards. I made the appointment and planned on asking how to get a job there. However, when I was greeted by the Director, she basically sent me to the nurse supervisors. They explained the terms of the job to me and I had a job! Just like that! No interview. No stress. Just a job. Five days after graduation. Unheard of. Blessed. It was no accident things happened as they did. It was no accident that I started volunteering at this particular hospital. It was no accident that they created the NICU cuddler program when they did. And it was no accident that I befriended the nurses that would eventually ask the supervisors to hire me. Heavenly Father cleared a path for me...right where I needed to be. When I went to nursing school, pediatrics was of interest to me as was labor and delivery. But NICU is where I belong. It's where I fit. I feel so blessed to have been directed along this path and given such a huge blessing of a job in a really difficult economy for nurses. Fasting works. And Heavenly Father has a plan for us. Whether we know it or not, he does. We're really just along for the ride. Now if only I could relax along the ride...life would be a lot more pleasant!

I can do hard things...

A few weeks ago I started working night shift. Anyone who knows me knows how much I like to sleep. I like to go to bed early and sleep as long as I can. It's my hobby. Sleeping. Can't get enough. Literally. Being a new grad ane new on the job, night shift is just one of the rites of passage. I don't have a choice. I will have to do it until a shift opens up on days and my name comes up on the "list" of "Please move me to days people". I am somewhat of a whiner. Really. But I've been trying to keep this all in perspective. My kids are generally gone until 4:30 p.m. School gets out and then they are involved in sports activities so they are gone all day. I can literally come home and sleep from 8:30ish to 4:30ish. Plenty of sleep. Technically. Except that I'm an insomniac at night and even worse trying to sleep in the days. I spend my nights at work fighting to stay awake and fighting even more to remain mentally alert. It's an ICU people! These babies are sick and they need a nurse who is awake and competent..neither of which I feel at night at work. I loved my 5 weeks orienting on days. It was soooo busy. All the different people are in and out..doctors, speech therapist, occupational therapists, respiratory therapists, ultra sound techs, x-ray techs, parents, family members, etc. etc. All the procedures happen during the day. All the craziness happens during the day. The days go by FAST! Nights, on the other hand are the opposite. There is always a doctor somewhere in the unit, but that's about it. No excitement. No procedures. No nothing. Which is exactly why lots of nurses really like to work night. You do what you have to do and generally have plenty of time to read, be on the internet, text, whatever...all of which are big no no's during the day. No one is there at night to enforce the rules so no one cares. Which....is exactly why I'm bored out of my mind all night long. I can't do all those fun things yet because I am orienting and someone is looking over my shoulder. I just try to keep moving so I don't keel over in the middle of the night. Anywho..that's not what this post really is about. I've been trying to get my family on some sort of regular routine when i work nights. I have really wanted to be better about scripture study with them so I have started reading it to them over dinner before I go to work (I rarely it what they're eating and when they're eating...so it's not a big deal to do it that way.) Tonight we were reading in first Nephi about when the Lord told Nephi to go back to Jerusalem and get the plates and he basically said, "I can do hard things." Many times I expect my kids to do "hard things." It's just part of life. It made me realize...working nights is hard. But I can do it. And I think I will be more blessed if I do it without being such a whiner. So...good things about nights...More $. We are trying to pay off Rick's student loan and the second on our house (which we got when we initially purchased the house to avoid PMI). A couple more months and we'll have that second on our house done with. Sweet. The more money I make, the faster I can do something more fun with the money than paying off stupid debts...Fun stuff...like get Carter braces and save for missions... Rick is amazing. He handles everything when I am working. When I work nights, I can get the kids from practices, go to their sports competitions, fix dinner, and do all the after school stuff. I head off to work and they only have another hour or so before they're in bed anyway (where I wish I were headed too...but boo hoo for me). If one of the kids is sick, they can stay home with me. Even if I'm sleeping, I'm here... I'm tired all the time whether I work nights or days. Might as well get paid more for being tired. I'm an insomniac. If I'm gonna be awake, might as well get paid for it, right? Once I am on my own without a preceptor, I can read and do other things at night to keep myself awake. Anywho, the point of this is that right now I have to do a hard thing. It sucks, but I can make it suck less. This is a temporary situation, not permanent. I am going to keep this in mind next time I have to make my kids do something hard. It sucks. But it's doable. So suck it up and do it (talking to myself here, not the kids...).

Weekend long date with Jake...

A couple weekends ago, Rick took Carter, Bella, and Malia to So. Cal to visit the grandparents. I couldn't go because I worked on Saturday and Monday. Jake couldn't go because he had a scout campout on Friday and Saturday. Saturday night, I got off early and Jake was done by 5:00, so the date began. We talked about our options and decided on a movie. Jake was excited to go to the movie, even though it was with me! I know these days are short lived, but it was nice to have him be excited to hang out with me. Sunday we went to church followed by a nice long nap in the quiet house. By the afternoon, I decided to introduce him to a classic...Ferris Bueler's Day off. I think I may regret that at some point, but we had a great time watching it. We made gluten free peanut butter chocolate chip cookie bars. I ate one and Jake chipped away at the rest of the pan. By the next morning, the whole thing was gone! I ended up having Monday off, but he had a commitment so we met up at lunchtime and went to Doghouse Grill, one of his favorites. By the time we got home, the troops were on their way back. I so enjoyed having the whole weekend with Jake. He is such a good kid. He's funny. He gets my sense of humor. He's game for anything. He would've been an awesome only child. I know as he gets older, my one on one time with him will be less and less as he will have other places he'd rather be. But I will cherish the time we spent that weekend just enjoying each other's company. He was genuinely happy to have me all to himself, and I felt the same. This past weekend, Jake (and Bella) competed in Destination Imagination, as they have done for the past couple years. Jake's team took first place in regionals and Bella's took second. It had been agreed upon beforehand that no team would go to state because it was being held in San Diego which presented its share of hardships both timewise and financially. However, I was asked a few days after the competition if we would allow Jake and his team to go if they raised the money to do so and figured out a way to get down there and back. Though I was sad that Bella wouldn't have the opportunity, we decided to allow him to do so. Not all the parents felt the same way. In the end, one set of parents would not allow their child to go. That child has been a good friend of Jake's since we moved here. When Jake learned of this situation, he and his friends had a talk at school. Jake and the other boy decided they dind't feel good about leaving their friend behind, so they opted not to go. When Jake shared this with me, I could not have been more proud. Though I allowed him to make his own decision, the fact that he valued his friendship with this one child more than a competition (which her very much wanted to attend) made me a proud parent. I've learned that there are times when as parents we have to step back and allow our children to make their own choices, and accept the consequences. The rest of the team is not particularly happy with Jake or the other two. However, all three boys who will not be attending the competition are still going to help with fundraising and teaching the new team members their parts in the skit. Hopefully, this will lessen the blow to the disapointed remaining team members and allow for their friendships to continue. They are a great bunch of kids. Jake's growing up...

This one's for me...

It's been awhile. But this week, I had an unusual experience (for me, anyway) and I wanted to write about it. Since no one reads this blog anymore, I figure it's a safe place. Thursday was a special day for us. Bella turned 10. My beautiful daughter has officially entered the tween years. I had worked three 12's the previous three days. And maybe that's the reason I was feeling so grateful to have the whole day to prepare for her birthday. I made her requested breakfast (also unusual for me), shopped for her and picked up her cake and ordered the pizza for her friend party at the local trampoline place. Throughout the day, I reflected on the months prior to her birth. Rick was in lawschool, I had a toddler and a baby at home...and another baby was coming. I had resigned myself to the fact we would have all boys. In my 7th month of pregnancy, we learned she was a girl. But I didn't believe it. I couldn't allow myself to believe it, because I wanted it sooo bad. I remember frantically asking the moment whe was gone, what is it? What is it? My mom, also my L&D nurse looked at me and said in a very duh! tone...It's a girl, just like they told you. And then, the tears flowed. Interestingly, it was the only time I ever cried at a delivery. Not that I was any less excited or happy with my other children, but I had not allowed myself to hope until she was in my arms. I looked at her and melted. My dreams had come true. Those next two days in the hospital, when I was alone, she was always in my arms. I didn't want to set her down. I was in heaven. And I continued to cherish and adore her. She was always dressed so adorable with something in her hair so people would know whe was a girl. I remember my excitement when I could finally put pigtails in her hair. She was so beautiful. Fast forward 10 years. She is still the most beautiful girl. She is smart, so smart. She is kind and generous. Just today we were shopping, spending her birthday giftcards and she spent about half her money on a gift for Aunt Courtney's wedding and one treat for each of the kids. This is routine for her...she always buys something for her siblings, even when they aren't being very nice. At Christmas time, we donated money as a family to a children's cancer Christmas. She freely gave every penny she had to the cause and recruited a friend of hers to donate as well. She isn't afraid to share the gospel and invite her friends to church. She is wise beyond her years, almost like an old soul. She looks out for others. She has a friend who she met shortly after moving to Fresno. They went to preschool together. In elementary school, this child has struggled with friends. Bella always makes sure he has someone to hang out with and that he's included. She does this all on her own because she genuinely is concerned for others. I have been very blessed with such a wonderful daughter. Make no mistake about it, she is a sassy one. She is confident and sure of herself. She knows what she wants and she'll let you know. She is strong. So as she enters her teenage years, I hope I will always remember her 10-year-old self. She is such a blessing in our family and I will be forever grateful we have been blessed to be her earthly parents.

 Happy Halloween y'all!  So these are for the non-facebookers.  I have spent months (literally) planning their costumes.  Charlie became obsessed with Sleeping Beauty early in the year, and she was particularly taken with Maleficent and would repeat certain lines like "touch the spindle, touch it I say!" and "prick her finger on the spindle of a spinning wheel... and DIE!"... We couldn't resist.  We knew what she had to be for Halloween this year.  It seemed appropriate to make Josie Sleeping Beauty because at the time, she was sleeping 18+ hours a day (thanks to fluid in her ears and chronic ear infections for 8 months straight).  

Finding a toddler size Maleficent costume is essentially impossible so I had no choice but to make one.  After months of trying to figure out how to do it, Mom came to AZ in August and we knocked version #1.  Then in late September I came across an original Maleficent pattern on Etsy.  So, I had to get it.  I went to California the first week of October for Kenzie's fall break and mom and I knocked out version #2 of this costume.  So awesome!  Wish the mask fit a little better... but all in all it turned out great!  Thanks mom for all your help!                                                                       

 Check out that awesome cape lining!  Mom you are just amazing- I really couldn't have done it without you.  Charlie had a really cute, full black tulle dress to wear underneath her cape, but she said it was too itchy and pretty much went ballistic when I tried to put it on her.  So she just wore tights and a leotard underneath instead... Anyone need a big, fluffy tulle dress in a size 2????

 My friend Aimee told me about a cute little pumpkin patch not too far from my house.  It took me forever to finally take the girls there.  I took them on Halloween day.  There was a cute train ride, hay mazes, animals to feed, little jumpers and a few games to play- totally geared at young kids and very inexpensive (aka Charlie and Josie were free!).  Pumpkins were 3-5$.  Can't beat that.  It's my new favorite pumpkin patch (besides Lombardi's which isn't in this state).  This is my most favorite pic of Charlie- probably because you can see her face.  She hates the camera and will turn away anytime she sees it.  I have lots of pics of the back of her head (grrr!!!)

 Josie's favorite part (besides here lollipop) was feeding the goats.  She loved when the goat licked the food right off her hand.  She would giggle and giggle.  Don't worry fans, there was plenty of hand sanitizer there ; )

Stinker Josie kept trying to pull the pumpkins from the bottom of the pile and would get so frustrated when she couldn't pick them up.  I found it rather amusing so I snapped this pic- I'm a mean mom, what else can I say.

We hope you all had a fun Halloween.  I'm not gonna lie, I'm glad it's over.  Ready for a holiday that doesn't involve me making 3+ costumes...

More kid funnies...

Scenario..I have a large glass base thing on the table filled half with candy corns and a white candle in the middle. I started to notice that the candy corn level was getting lower and lower. So, I say to the kids, "guys, somebody's been eating the candy corns." Carter and jake both say, "we don't even like candy corns". Malia...without being accused or even looked at says, "Okay fine. I won't eat the rest of them." They kill me...

Kid funnies...

Carter...I am doing terrible on this essay because I don't know how to spell anything. Me...Carter, what do you do if you don't know how to spell a word? Carter...Ask you? Me...NO! Malia...Pray about it Carter. Me...seriously?

Thought for a Sunday...

"Be still, and know that I am God." This is my thought for the last couple of weeks and probably the next couple. As you all know, i will graduate in December and attempt to find a job. It has been hard for me to restrain myself from getting a job now (like an aid or something) in the hospitals just so I have a foot in the door. Everybody seems to be doing it...and the job market is not good. Nevertheless, I have prayed and fasted a lot and I realize that now is not the time. I keep getting the answer, "not yet." If you know me at all, you know I am a doer. I like to take care of things myself. That, my friends, is why it's so hard to sit back and watch my friends getting some type of job and not FREAK OUT! I am doing absolutely everything I can, from guarding my 4.0 GPA with my life, to volunteering anywhere I think might have potential, to doing my internship at a smaller, closer hospital where I might actually have a shot at getting hired as a new grad. I am doing all I can. "Be still, and know that I am God." I just keep repeating it. It's from the D&C somewhere and I read it one day after thinking about some things. And, I'm trying...to be still, and let God be in charge. I hate that! I like to be the boss. (Does "you're not the boss of me" sound familiar to anyone?) Yeah, I say that a lot.

Our Newest Arrival.

 Welcome to the world, Baby Scarlett!

 

Just a couple shots of Scarlett's adoring fan club...

Sunday funnies

After sorting some camping supplies, I was playing a game of solitaire with the cards I had just put in the take pile.

I said, "I win!" as I gathered up the cards.

Ash said, in a mocking voice, "mom, it's a one person game, of COURSE you win!"

Then I was asking Justin for some math help with planning our meal for Monday. I asked "how much fritos should I get for 70 people?"

He promptly responded, 1400. Twenty per person.

Thank you Katherine.

New Coffee Table

Here's my most recent woodworking project - a coffee table made out of mahogany, walnut and zebrawood. The zebrawood is a veneer about 1/64" thick and is inlaid into the table top.  The walnut has some cool and unusual ribbon striping.  Now that it's all done, finished, and in the house, I just need to keep myself from freaking out every time one of the kids touches it!

Sampson falls

It had to come off, I couldn't take it any more. But I still think he's a handsome little devil!
The dots on his hands are a regular thing, he says he is iron man.

They're messing with me

Squirrels have been stealing our fruits and veggies again, including apples from my apple tree.  So I set up two traps and placed in each trap the uneaten portions of apples that the squirrels already got to.  Yesterday I checked the traps and found that a squirrel deftly removed the apple from one trap without triggering it, and placed the bait in the second trap, triggered the trap, and then escaped, leaving the second trap with two apples and NO SQUIRREL.  Those dirty, disease carrying, dirt eating, inbred, beady eyed, thieving, varmint loving, hole digging, rotten sons of rodents!!!  I swear they're just toying with me.  But mark my words - the last laugh will be mine.  Just this week the developer started tearing up the open field where they live in preparation for the next phase of the housing development.  Yes, we'll have more neighbors soon.  But those nasty critters will soon be out on the street.  Justice at last!!

Graduate

My little buddy graduated from preschool.  He is getting big, I can't believe it.  Then he gets bored and pesters me and I get excited for school in the fall.  He will be in a new transitional kindergarten program at our school.  I think he will like it.  I think I will like it too!  But I'm actually going to miss him.  Don't tell anyone.

Yosemite...it's about time!

We "hiked" to Lower Yosemite Falls. I say "hiked" because it was more like a nice stroll to the most gorgeous waterfall ever! The end of the hike was close enough to the falls that you could feel mist!


The kids loved climbing on all the huge rocks that were around the waterfalls. I think they would've spent the whole day climbing on the rocks below the falls had we not had a slight issue. Carter's blood sugar was really low and we had NO snacks! Poor kid, we told him he could run, climb, or goof off because the car was a good 25 minute walk away and we had no snacks. Lesson learned. Bring more juice when you are going to get lost in Yosemite!



I think this is Bridal Veil Falls. It was a nice little walk up to the falls as well. You could get so close to this one that you could easily fall in. Made for very HIGH anxiety levels for me :)


You can't live this close to Yosemite and NOT go! So, after 5 years of living here, we went! The kids LOVED it! And who wouldn't? It is absolutely gorgeous!
And, maybe the best thing about our timing...there was snow! Plenty to make snowballs with! We weren't exactly dressed for snow, but the kids liked picking it up and throwing it at each other and watching it in the rivers.

This is definitely a trip we are going to make again. Who's coming with us?

Spring break...and 7 weeks off nursing school!

I don't know why...but I had 7 weeks off clinical (hospital days). And we were BUSY! So Kristin, this is for you...note the lack of Easter pics. I don't know...just didn't happen.



Bella turned 9! This was an "off" party year...so we celebrated as a family. Bella wanted to go to her favorite...Home Town Buffet, so Bella and I went for dinner and we all had dessert together.



Jake got an award at school for "Character Counts." They invite the whole family to come and have a slide show going with each kid's picture up. They are nominated by one of their teachers who writes something about them and it is read to the audience while they are standing on stage. Funny story, we thought they were feeding us dinner, so we were starving! Instead, we all ate chocolate cake for dinner. Yum...



And...Carter decided to play volleyball this year. He did awesome! He was messing around one day, imitating one of his friends and discovered that he had a fabulous over hand serve. He played with his buddies Caden and Logan and had a great season.




Jake and Bella participated in Destination Imagination. Bella's team one first place for the Central Valley Region and Jake's team won third place. Both advanced to the California State Finals where they competed once again and had a great time.



Bella is on the spirit squad at school. She has wanted to do it FOREVER, and she HATES it (Thank Goodness!!!) I don't think she'll be doing it again next year, but she likes hanging out with her friend Taryn.



We headed to so. cal for the last of the vacation to hang with the cousins. I only got pics of the girls at the beach because the boys were gone most of the day deep sea fishing. Ash and Malia in their matching swim suits...the camera was dying which is why it has a funky background...makes it look aged, don't you think?



Bella and Camille



Bella and Ash



And the loot after the Easter egg hunt at Nana and Papa's. 56 eggs each people. Yeah, we need some cousins to join us next year. Any volunteers?

Where are all your Easter pics people?!?!

Since I FINALLY got released as RS Secretary, I have more time to blog. People! Why hasn't anyone posted since February? C'mon, I know y'all took pictures for Easter so share them. Here, I'll start.

These were one of my favorite crafts that Auntie Courtney did with the kids. So cute!
Don't be jealous, but we got to spend the day before Easter with Grandma Opal. She helped dye Easter eggs, make birds nests, and supervise sugar cookie making.
We didn't end up taking any family pics taken on Easter- bummer since the kids were all color coordinated. I tried to convince the boys to get back in their church clothes after church so I could take some pics in the backyard of them, but they passed.
Sweet Josie ate WAY more candy than any baby that age should-complements of her big sister Charlie who kept feeding her gobs of pastel colored jelly beans (and the proof is all over my carpet!).

Happy Birthday Josie!!!

I always hate when birthdays come because we have no family here to celebrate with... This year we were lucky enough to have Courtney here for Josie's big day. Josie was actually sick on her birthday, Stephen was out of town and the boys were with their mom so we postponed her birthday celebration until everyone could be there. So Saturday morning we had a little brunch with Stephen's brother Nathan and his family....

We got started late (big surprise) and apparently Josie got tired of waiting so she raided the pantry and found her favorite snack... Mini Nilla Wafers. In fact, we ran out of crackers that day so for the next 2 days she kept grabbing my box of panko bread crumbs (which is the same color) and would sit down on the floor of the pantry and try to tear the box open. She would throw a fit every time we took the box away from her. Needless to say, Courtney and I replaced the box of Nilla Wafers today.
Josie on her birthday throne. Yes I did make a tutu for her high chair tray. Thank you PINTEREST for the idea!
So I may have lit a candle in the center of the pancakes and placed it on her tray so we could sing Happy Birthday to her... and she may have reached right out and touched the flame before we could even start singing... She WOULD NOT touch her pancakes until that candle was removed.
Then she went to town! She ate every last little scrap of food on her plate.
And after brunch it was time for her to open her present... Thanks Nana and Papa! As usual, the car was a huge hit! And perfect size. Her feet already touch the floor.

My latest project

For a few years I've had this 20" x 40" poster commemorating UCLA's last defeat of USC (and I say last in both senses of the word - this was the most recent time it happened, and at the rate things are going probably won't ever happen again), but never found a design I liked for a frame until now. This frame is made up of 170-plus individual pieces of mahogany plywood glued together, with bevels cut around the edges to show a little of the lighter plywood underneath. The result is a brick and mortar effect reminiscent of the red brick buildings of UCLA campus. It was a fun project that took a long time, cutting, routing, and gluing up all those pieces.