Thursday, November 15, 2007

Edwina Scissorhands

OK, seriously, it never ends with the girls. I think I am going to resign myself to a life of being tortured by women - my daughters specifically. You all know now the stories of the diapers, the office, the doorknob and who knows how many others? Well, I went up to put them to bed and found another real nice surprise. By way of some background, Brooke can figure out a way to puncture anything that is stuffed and get the fuzz out. It started with stuffed pigs. It moved to a stuffed soccer ball. Then to a stuffed dog. Let me just say that if you are anything like me you have absolutely no idea how much fuzz those things have in them, and these were not big. But, Brooke - aka Edwina Scissorhands - manages to find a way to stick her little mosquito needle nose hand into the seams of these things and suck out the fuzz. Then she strategically places piece after piece around the room inches apart from the rest so there is no easy cleanup mechanism. No biggie right? Just vacuum it. Well, you see, our vacuum is on the fritz. It is history. So, that gives us the joy of picking things up by hand. So, anyway, I go up today and find the crib mattresses (which they now sleep on in the media room with no bed to go with it, for obvious reasons). Yep, one of them had the vinyl outside of it basically ripped half off on one side. Guess what was showing - the foam inside. So, to avoid a repeat of the pigs and the dog and the soccer ball, they now sleep on the floor with a pillow, a blanket and their barely stuffed animals. Honestly, I'm not sure I knew that OCD started so early. Let me assure you - IT DOES and Edwina is the archetype of childhood OCD.

To add to my fun for the week, I had a craving for brownies last night. It was late and I was so desperate for them that I started to make them from scratch. That is until I got to the part where you put in a minor ingredient called sugar. Oops, we didn't have enough. So, I decided to go to the store. I was wearing my oversized T-shirt, my PJ's and my slippers. As I walked out the door, the sprinklers were on. What a nice surprise! My car was parked right in front of the yard. I ran (as fast as I could in slippers) through the sprinklers to get to the car. DOH! I forgot to unlock the car. So, as I scramble to unlock it, I get soaked by the sprinkler that is spraying my car. Nice! Then, I get the brownies and get home. And, to top it off, I overcook the brownies.

Need I say more?

7 comments:

Michelle said...

Somebody really has it out for you Dale. I'd be very cautious about waking up in the morning. Maybe if you just stay in bed, you will be safe from the havoc that follows you.

Tamara said...

Hallelujah, Holy Freak, Where's the Tylenol?

That is a Real Nice Surprise Clark...a Real Nice Surprise.

Stephanie said...

It was pretty funny! Never underestimate what Brooke is capable of getting into... she's so funny about that! Thank goodness we can laugh about it. Otherwise, we'd go insane.

Katie L. said...

You guys should write a book, seriously. At least it would give other parents a laugh. I am SO happy not to have twins. And I'm crossing everything that can be crossed that Nate will be a toddler I can handle!

Stephanie said...

It's not as bad as we make it sound... or maybe it is. At the same time, though, it's amazingly great having twins - the times the girls let me cuddle both at the same time is something real special and unique, I wouldn't trade it for the world no matter how many things Brooke gets into. She's high energy, though, that's for sure! and she seems to be getting more high energy as she gets older.

j-liz said...

Wow Dale, I'm speechless. You weren't that bad of a kid were you? I mean if this is what you're getting after you borderline angelic childhood, I wonder what I am in store for?

Dee Lisonbee said...

ok that was the best laugh I have had in days - I dont know whether it was the girls sleeping in the middle of the floor without mattresses or you standing beside your car in your house slippers with the sprinkler running ---- thanks so much for the light moment, I needed it.