Tonight, Brandon was afraid to take a shower because it's been thundering and lightning. After telling him to take his shower and to be sure and wash his hair, he gets in and when he gets out I notice that the top of his head is dry. Here's how the conversation went.
Me. "Brandon, how come the top of your head is dry? Did you wash your hair?"
Brandon: "YES mommy!"
Me. "Then why is your head dry?"
Brandon: "huh??? I washed it."
Later on in the evening, as I was giving him a hug before his bedtime, I noticed that his hair didn't look like it had just been washed, so I asked again. This time Dale was standing there. Here's how it went:
Me: "Brandon (in a low tone), did you wash your hair? It doesn't seem clean. Did you lie to me?"
Brandon: "Yes, I lied."
Me: "Why did you lie?"
Brandon: "Because I thought I would get in trouble."
Me. (Dale laughing) "well you're gonna get in trouble now."
Dale: "huh. You lied. We need to come up with an appropriate consequence, right Steph?"
Brandon: "I know an appropriate one. How about no nintendo and playstation for an entire week... AFTER I clean up the whole toy room."
Dale: "I don't know..."
Brandon: "How about a month?"
Stephanie: "What's he trying to avoid?"
Dale: "Maybe the big 'S'?"
Stephanie: "What, you mean soap?"
Brandon: "NOOOOOO!"
Dale: "Well, you do lie with your mouth."
Then off to the bathroom they go. I can't believe Brandon was willing to give up playstation and nintendo for an entire month ON TOP of cleaning up the disastrous toy room which would probably take him two days! All just to try and avoid SOAP???? I guess we know what the right punishment is from now on. :)
On a side note, I posted some videos from Brooke's 3rd Gymnastics Private Class on my blog. I'd post them on here as well if they didn't take sooo long. One of the videos includes her first fall off the high bar, which is about 6' high. Anyway, check em out and let us know what you think!
16 comments:
That is some serious fear instilled by soap. What kind of soap do you use? Next time, I'd probably take him up on the cleaning offer!!
Lisa, the best part is the kid is an attorney at heart. The cleaning offer is already part of the deal. He has to do that anyway. That is as a result of a little "incident" at church yesterday. Specifically, a guy I home teach came up to me in the foyer and said, "So, I have a story for you." Turns out Brandon's teacher was AWAL today. And, the boys (yes, my son (OK - I mean Stephanie's son) and the bishop's son (named Nate by the way - watch out Justin)) decided to hang the 3 erasers in the room to the lights on the ceiling using tape. (Since when to sunday school classrooms have tape?) Anyway, they then proceeded to either stand on or jump from the table to try to hit the erasers. So, the cleaning task was the consequence for the eraser incident. The relevance of that to the hair washing incident is that he can't play any of those games until the toy room is cleaned up. Once that is cleaned up, he can play (assuming there is nothing new for today that needs a consequence). Let's just say yesterday wasn't one of his better days.
And, so that this email is not totally non-responsive, the soap is Oil of Olay (probably with shea butter or something).
Brandon is a legend. Just like his dad...
Poor Stephanie!
I would like to add that I've seen Dale in the middle of a soap incident with Brando and I would bargain for anything else too! For reals, the kid will probably be flossing soap chunks out of his teeth till his Junior Prom rolls around!
Dale, all I can say is "good job buddy" (Scott Jackson style)
Yes, I can't even watch whenever Dale does the soap deed. It's too painful for me as a mother to see my son go through that. :)
My mother taught me well. There is a method to the madness. You see, the whole point is for them to remember the experience. I can vouch for it being memorable because I am still having flashbacks.
Anyway, it is best to get a soap with some obvious flavor. Mom's pick was Zest. Let me tell you, that stuff is RANK! I mean, let's start with the fact that it is basically a gelatinous texture if you even get it near water. And, top it off with the fact that it has enough deoderant and other chemicals to make a chemical weapon.
Mind you, that's just the first part. Then there is the caking it on the teeth. It's not about the tongue. That is just the finishing touch. It is really about caking it on all 4 lines of molars. Then, for good measure, rub it back and forth on the front teeth (top and bottom). They are particularly well suited for scraping soap off the bar.
So, I may or may not have used Irish Spring for years for this purpose with Brandon. (Since Steph refused to buy Zest, that was as close as I could get.) I figured Brandon needed the same memory of green soap that I had. (Any wonder I hate green?) Anyway, if I can find it, it is particularly useful to find a bar that has been sitting in a moist area, because the soap comes off on the teeth so much easier. (Again, with Zest, no need to moisten, it is by nature moist.)
Anyway, apparently, the method gets the point across. We really haven't had to use it much at all. But, the memory is sweetening through the ages for Brandon. :)
About the Irish Spring... I threw that stuff away once so that Dale wouldn't use it on Brandon and he actually WENT OUT AND DUG IT OUT OF THE TRASH!
I don't allow him to use Irish Spring though... Dale knows better. That's just too mean!
like father - like son
On second thought,if we turned Mom loose on the Guantanamo detainees she would have them singing like a bunch of canaries or humming "I'm forever blowing bubbles . . ."
On second thought,if we turned Mom loose on the Guantanamo detainees she would have them singing like a bunch of canaries or humming "I'm forever blowing bubbles . . ."
I want to thank you all for the best laughs I have had in years.
reading the comments that are made is not only enlightening (since my failing memory has selectively removed the recollection of the abuse you guys endured) but frankly is HILARIOUS....who would have thought child abuse could be so entertaining. The value of a good laugh during these trying times can not be overrated so - THANKS TO ONE AND ALL--you guys are amazing and wonderful and funny as heck-thanks
Wow, I never knew there was such an art to cleaning someone's mouth out with soap. I'm going to have to try it, because "sassy sauce" doesn't have the same lasting effect. And how do I get Justin to sign up to be the bad guy?
Katie, Steph usuallly gets me to be the bad guy by picking up the rolling pin (you know the big marble one for rolling dough), getting a nice grimace on her face, and then saying "Remember the candle holder??? We don't want another incident like that now do we?"
I then promptly turn tail and run because, let's face it, the wrought iron candle holder to the head was not that fun. I'd rather be the bad guy. :)
What in the world? (me, laughing hysterically)
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