Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Roommates.

You wanted more roommate stories... Well ask and ye shall receive. You know that one roommate that cursed that other one out a while back? Did I ever mention that during that fight she punched a hole in the wall? Did I also mention that she is 6 ft tall and plays for the BYU basketball team? What I'm getting at is that she's scary. Nice nice nice girl...until you set her off...which brings me to my story. Today we have cleaning checks and although I reminded the girls a few times each, I was the only one who decided to participate. I don't know why I was even the least bit surprised when I've been cleaning up after them this entire semester. Anyway, I was up late prepping for it and decided that it was about time for the he-woman's (aka scary roommate's) smelly gym bags to be moved out of our living room. I thought I was the only one home so I opened her door and dragged in one of the bags and I hear "hello?" Dunt dunt duuuunnnnn...I had woken the beast.

Me: "Sorry, I didn't know you were home. We have cleaning checks tomorrow so I was just moving your bags."
Beast: "I'll move them in the morning!"
Me: "Ok well just have them moved by 9 because that's when they're coming."
Beast: "Shut my door!"

A few minutes later she walks out, drags the other bag into her room, does some laundry, and leaves the apartment. After she left I moved her laundry basket that had been sitting in the hallway for about a month into the laundry room and finished cleaning. I was working on a Halloween costume when he...I mean she...stormed in the door, got to her room and yelled, "Courtney I though I told you I would move the stuff in the morning." I thought maybe she was sleep walking before and didn't remember moving the bag in herself so I yelled back, "You did move it...already...." She was like, "NO! MY LAUNDRY BASKET!"

Seriously, I was fearing for my life. I was thinking, if she curses me out it will be the least of my worries. The craziest part of this all to me is that I WAS CLEANING UP AFTER HER!!! I never ask her to clean, I never complain to her about cleaning up after her, I moved a bag into her room and she turned into the chick from the exorcist. I would not be sad if I never had another roommate again in my life.

Oh and just a little fun fact, she likes to turn our heater up to 90 degrees and then when our apartment turns into a sauna, turn on the air conditioning to compensate. My gas bill is going to be excellent this year.

5 comments:

Dale said...

Courtney, I had a real nice surprise with roommates when I got back from my mission. I mean it was special. I went from a pretty good environment (the mission) to outer darkness. I hated every minute of it. They called me "the mole" because I would go home and go to my room. One of the happiest days of my life was moving out of that rathole. I think it was comparable to Bellmont.

Tamara said...

Wow. I mean, I'm officially speechless. Wow.

Michelle, do you have any pills that Coach could slip in her roommate's proteing shakes that would help her "relax" (wink wink)?

Coach, maybe that's your best bet. Perhaps you should threaten he-man that if (s)he doesn't shape up, you're going to report to BYU housing that (s)he's a man living in women's housing and that
(s)he'll be in big trouble then.

Michelle said...

Seriously...roommates can be such a REAL NICE SURPRISE. Getting married was so fabulous because I didn't have any stupid girls for roommates any more. Between my mission and BYU, I had some real winners...try to laugh if you can...even if it's out loud in he-man's face...

Courtney said...

Tammy...excellent point. Michelle...are you freaking crazy? Did I not mention she punched a hole in the wall during her last fight? There ain't no way in h that I'm laughing in her face. The good news is that she's a bit bi-polar so when she walked in this morning she was all buddy buddy with me.

Katie L. said...

Oh Coach,
I'm sitting here trying hard to decide which is harder to live with, roommates or toddlers. Ashley hasn't made any sounds today that couldn't fall under the categories of "whining," "crying," or "screaming." But I had a few winner roommates also, and I do not miss those days at all. It is great to hear about your adventures in BYU land to remind me that I don't want to go back.